Are you and your partner thinking about getting married? How exciting! You are beginning to realize that you have found “the one” and your daydreams about walking down the aisle and creating a family may soon become a reality (not to mention no more blind dates!). But have you and your partner had enough serious conversations to make sure you are compatible in the long-term? For example, do you really know that your partner wants children as much as you do? What if you discover, a month before the wedding, that your partner won’t even consider having kids? Is this issue a deal breaker or just a heart breaker?

Don’t wait until after the question has been popped, the cake ordered, the dress purchased, and the venue secured to start counseling! Pre-engagement counseling is an option for forward-thinking couples who want to make sure their relationship gets started on a solid foundation. Pre-engagement counseling provides a calm space to work through any issues before the whirlwind of wedding planning begins. Think of pre-engagement counseling as a form of preventative medicine. It allows couples the opportunity to examine their compatibility on a long-term basis.  In fact, pre-engagement and pre-marital counseling can reduce the risk of divorce and help couples better understand their compatibility, according to studies by clinical psychologists with the PREPARE/ENRICH pre-marital counseling program.

Perhaps there are ways that you interact now that you’d like to change before the unhealthy patterns become solidified in your relationship. The online assessments in the PREPARE/ENRICH program provide a wealth of information about your current relationship on a variety of topics that can help you and your partner identify trouble spots early on. With divorce rates in first-time marriages hovering around 50%, it might be a good idea to invest time and money in determining if the two of you are right for each other and work through any issues early in your relationship. Why not explore all the facets of each other’s personality with as much excitement as you explore the facets of your new diamond ring?

In pre-engagement counseling based on the PREPARE/ENRICH model, couples work with a trained marriage and family therapist to:

• Identify strength and growth areas
• Explore personality traits
• Strengthen communication skills
• Resolve conflicts and reduce stress
• Compare family backgrounds
• Comfortably discuss financial issues
• Establish personal, couple, and family goals

At Madison Marriage and Family Therapy in Midtown Manhattan, our therapists tailor sessions to meet the unique needs of each couple and find just the right exercises to strengthen your relationship and guide you on the path toward a healthier relationship. While many religious institutions offer pre-martial counseling, marriage and family therapists are in a unique position to offer secular, nondenominational counseling. We can also help interfaith couples who seek a safe, nonjudgmental space to explore how they will create a new family from their two different traditions. Call today to set up an appointment: 917.488.6364.